Old TVs OnlyInsel Air, the Dutch Caribbean carrier that serves as the national airline of Curaçao, notes helpfully, “A television is not a regular piece of luggage.” Duly noted. We tend to agree. But a lot of digital nomads and long term travelers have a base. Maybe you’re moving/upgrading yours.
Insel Air on Packing TVsFor a 35-inch television a fee of USD $40 will be charged. A 2nd television will be charged USD $80. If the television is between 35– 42 inches, an oversize fee of USD $40 applies on top of the regular fee. Insel does not allow televisions over 42” inch onboard its aircraft. These must be transported as cargo. Unfortunately in 2014, 63% of TV sets sold around the world had a 40+ inch screen, so chances are, if you’re traveling with a relatively new TV, you’ll be paying the oversize fee or you’ll have to search for a different carrier. Hmm…
You Don’t Mess With The MahanSpeaking of TVs, Iran’s Mahan Air knows a thing or two. “There’s a lot more to a Mahan Air passenger than comfortable seats and delicious food. For a start there is a 42-inch LED TV displaying live pilot camera for take-off and landing and short video clips during flight.” Hot-cha! Take it away, Mahan! The site, the song, the tech support team… *Glorious!*
Throwing Lamp ShadeMango, a state-owned low fare South African carrier, makes this special provision for certain household articles:
HOUSEHOLD ARTICLESBecause you know you aren’t going to find it back home. Sometimes Guests find the perfect household article in the most unlikely place. It’s that object that you just have to have, because you know you aren’t going to find it back home. The following household articles are accepted provided they are correctly packaged and do not exceed the recommend baggage allowance:
- Lamp shades
- And items of a similar nature.
Baby Weight ConceptAccording to the ‘Weight Concept’ of Singapore-based Silk Air, your “infant is only permitted 10kg of baggage.” One question. Why don’t you pick on someone your own size, Silk?
Trafficking Burgers On The World’s Worst AirlineA few years ago, Air Koryo became famous for trafficking McDonald’s burgers into Pyongyang from China on a daily basis to feed the North Korean political elite. We can only guess that what appealed was McDonald’s adherence to Dear Leader Kim Jong Il’s original ‘double bread with meat’ recipe. ‘Double bread with meat’ is known colloquially as gogigyeopbbang and yes, Kim Jong Il really claimed to have invented the hamburger. Air Koryo also happens to be the world’s worst and only 1-star airline with a long record of safety violations. However, there are recent signs indicating that distinction may not last. According an article in Bloomberg, Air Koryo is modernizing its Pyongyang terminal, fleet and all-important flight attendant’s uniforms in an effort to move up in the rankings. We shall see. In any event, if you’re flying Air Koryo, be sure to leave your “running dogs of Western imperialism” behind. They’re forbidden (presumably, on pain of death) in both the cabin and hold and no, they may not even be sent as cargo freight… …you traitorous half-baked reactionary, you!
Liquids // BladesNordwind Airlines is headquartered in Moscow, with its main hub at Sheremetyevo International Airport. Secreted deviously under their ‘Information on Liquids’ section, they enumerate the various types of edged weapons that are permitted to be carried in the hold (not, thankfully, the cabin). The list was pretty exhaustive and we had to look a couple of them up. They include:
- Swards [possibly a spelling error, though more interesting if not]
- Hunting knives
- Knives with sliding blades
- Knives with locks
- Utility knives
- Scissors with the length of the blade over 60 mm
Blunt Instruments And Weaponized ToolsBesides tools that have the potential to be used as a pointed or edged weapon – such as drills, drill bits, box cutters, utility knives, saws, screwdrivers, crowbars, hammers, pliers, wrenches, spanners, blow torches – Etihad provides this helpful rundown of prohibited blunt instruments:
- Baseball and softball bats
- Clubs or batons
- Cricket bats
- Golf clubs
- Hockey sticks
- Lacrosse sticks
- Kayak and canoe paddles
- Billiards, snooker and pool cues
- Fishing rods
- Martial arts equipment
- Knuckle dusters
- Rice flails
- Nun chucks
- Kabatons and kubasaunts
OUT FOR JUSTICE (1991): Steven Seagal – “Hey Sticks!” [NSFW]
The Pineapple ClauseDelta, we discovered, has a special pineapple clause listed in their contract of carriage for domestic flights originating from points in Hawaii. So be sure to throw a sack of pineapples over your shoulder because “One box or mesh bag of pineapples does not count toward your free baggage allowance.”
Avalanche PackedIf you’d like to take your underwater torch, soldering iron or avalanche rescue pack, they are permitted, but you’ll have to notify Air Malta in advance. Also don’t ever do this:
Jumping PolesWizz Air, the low-cost Hungarian airline, will only accept your jumping poles for carriage if packed in textile sacks. However, Wizz Air does not provide any further information on what jumping poles actually are or why they specified that the sacks must be “textile.” Here’s what Google thinks. We’re still undecided.
Footballs and Human RemainsThou shalt deflate thy football before boarding Ryanair. While sports equipment can be carried on regardless of where you’re headed, be aware that “The transport of human remains is limited to the London Stansted-Knock route.”
The Sour StuffA lot of airlines list foodstuffs that may or may not be carried on board. However, Iran Aseman Airlines makes it clear that transport of lemon juice and pickles will not be tolerated. Furthermore, “sticky materials such as dates, honey and jam to the cabin is prohibited.” Don’t make that sour face.
ParachutesParachutes are A ok, even if they’re not exactly a vote of confidence. Most airlines allow you to carry your own parachute as long as it meets their carry-on limits. It’s highly unlikely that it’ll be of any use to you in the event of an erm… “water landing,” but you can bring one along nonetheless. Just make sure your parachute does not contain any pyrotechnics or smoke canisters. It’s for the best.
Umbi UmbiSadly your son and daughter are expressly prohibited from playing with their remote controlled toys on TAAG Angola, but you should still consider joining their Umbi Umbi Club, after all – it’s the frequent flyer club with the coolest name going.
Samsung and SwagwaysAchtung! The Samsung Galaxy Note 7 Flamethrower Edition has been banned by airlines globally since its recall. Also recently added to Air Malta’s list of ‘Items Forbidden For Carriage By Passengers’ are ‘Swegways, Swagways and Hoverboards.’ By the look of this this (allegedly) Bulgarian Swagway, that prohibition is perfectly understandable.
Zookeeping At 30,000 FeetMany airlines make provisions for dogs and cats to be transported as part of your hand luggage allowance. Some extend that service to household pets. Reptiles and primates (including lemurs, monkeys, orangutans, gorillas and chimpanzees), must typically be shipped as cargo and are not allowed in the cabin. In recent years, comfort or emotional support animals (as distinct from service animals for the visually impaired) have been on the rise. Here’s a comfort turkey on a Delta flight. Note its festive holiday collar. We’re sorry that Mr. P. T. Gobble, Esq.’s seatmates will have to endure his beady-eyed poultry stare as they sip their ginger ale. If you’re seated next to a turkey, vulture or other large raptor, we highly recommend skipping the pretzels. But at this point, we’re just hoping that Hollywood doesn’t pick up on the trend for next Thanksgiving. [NSFW Language Warning. It *is* Samuel L. Jackson after all. What do you expect?]. As a test, here’s video of an actual snake on an actual plane:
Business Class FalconryOne way to handle snakes is by bringing your falcons onto the plane, obvs. On Etihad Airways, business class guests and up are allowed not one, but (a generous) *two* winged beasts per seat. Coach passengers have to make do with one lonely bird of prey. We deeply regret that this screenshot from CanadianBusiness.com is photoshopped. Sigh… But we’ve got your real raptors right here: https://twitter.com/hillsy1989/status/541522239498104832
More Killer GraphicsKiller graphics are pretty much everywhere you look when it comes to baggage pages, but here’s a precious pearl courtesy of Uzbekistan Airways: Graphic design for the class of service = triple platinum. Note: that’s the equivalent of triple emerald if you’re a Oneworld Alliance member.
Chillvibes with ATA Airlines (Iran)
We’re Calling You Out, MahanShortly after Mahan Air won a place in our hearts (see above) and became the soundtrack for this article, we discovered this line item lurking under the free baggage allowance:
- An overcoat, wrap or blanket.
- An umbrella or walking stick.
- A small camera and/or binoculars.
- A reasonable amount of reading matter for the flight.
- Infant’s food for the consumption in flight.
- A pair of crutches and/or braces or other prosthetic device, such as an artificial limb *provided the passenger is dependent upon them [emphasis OURS].*
That’s All… For NowBased on the above, we’ve already deemed the Carry-on Bag Sizes project a *complete* success, but if you need a quick check of the baggage allowance before you book or board your next flight, mash the button below:
[stag_button url=”https://www.carryonbagsizes.com/?utm_source=blog&utm_campaign=weird_world_of_carry_on_bag_sizes&utm_medium=post” style=”blue” size=”large” type=”normal” target=”_self” icon=”” icon_order=”before”]Get Bag Sizes[/stag_button]Oh and if you came across any bizarre factoids or as yet undiscovered airlines, let us know in the comments and we’ll post your update. Carry-on Bag Sizes is an ongoing project. So, use it! Poke around just for fun or get your baggage restrictions quick and go. If you dig it, we’d be super grateful if you’d share it.